The Mega Collider

The four of us convened in the laboratory at midnight to run some tests on the Mega-Collider, and within minutes we had our first breakthrough. By which we mean, Liz pressed a button and a beam of pure white light shot out of the enormous chugging machine and blew a huge hole through the far wall.

The second breakthrough came just a moment later, this one of the cerebral variety and provided to us by Billy. As Liz went to press the button a second time, Billy called out for her to wait. The Mega-Collider would likely shoot another beam of strange destructive light, he reasoned. Only, this time there would be no wall to stop it. And so when Tommy asked what we should do, Billy’s face lit up with that expression that could only mean an elevated level of intellectual excitement, evidence of Billy’s forthcoming breakthrough.

We should try pressing the other buttons, Billy suggested.

So we did, which led to several subsequent breakthroughs: one through the opposite wall of the initial breakthrough, another through the ceiling, and one through the wall directly behind us. We were lucky to dodge the beam on that one.

At that point, we were all a bit frustrated. What were we doing wrong? Why could we get nothing out of the Mega-Collider aside from these immense breakthroughs? It was at that point that Tammy had a breakthrough of her own. What if, she said, that was the Mega-Collider’s function: to burst holes through walls and ceilings? What if whatever particles were colliding within its mass really, really hated structures and so were acting out?

We rejoiced at this discovery. But there was one breakthrough left. Which was when a team of security guards broke through the door. It was unnecessarily dramatic, honestly, given how many holes they could’ve come through. And their theatrics didn’t stop there. Rather than reason with us, they grabbed us roughly by our tails and carried us this way down the hall to the kennel where all of us lab rats live.

Breakthrough by GammaRay

Yes, we know Gamma-Ray went to school in Johannesburg. And yes, we know he ended up in Cape Town. And yes, we know that he worked for a number of major companies along the way, such as Guess Jeans. But was it a breakthrough that brought him to shirt design? Like, did he wake up one day and realize, “What I need to do is churn out wild, conceptual designs for shirts”? Or was it a chain of events, each subtly pushing him towards realizing his potential as an illustrator?

Who knows! And honestly, who cares! What matters is: his stuff is a lot of fun. (And if you don’t believe us, check out his Website and Instagram profile.

The Mega Collider

The four of us convened in the laboratory at midnight to run some tests on the Mega-Collider, and within minutes we had our first breakthrough. By which we mean, Liz pressed a button and a beam of pure white light shot out of the enormous chugging machine and blew a huge hole through the far wall.

The second breakthrough came just a moment later, this one of the cerebral variety and provided to us by Billy. As Liz went to press the button a second time, Billy called out for her to wait. The Mega-Collider would likely shoot another beam of strange destructive light, he reasoned. Only, this time there would be no wall to stop it. And so when Tommy asked what we should do, Billy’s face lit up with that expression that could only mean an elevated level of intellectual excitement, evidence of Billy’s forthcoming breakthrough.

We should try pressing the other buttons, Billy suggested.

So we did, which led to several subsequent breakthroughs: one through the opposite wall of the initial breakthrough, another through the ceiling, and one through the wall directly behind us. We were lucky to dodge the beam on that one.

At that point, we were all a bit frustrated. What were we doing wrong? Why could we get nothing out of the Mega-Collider aside from these immense breakthroughs? It was at that point that Tammy had a breakthrough of her own. What if, she said, that was the Mega-Collider’s function: to burst holes through walls and ceilings? What if whatever particles were colliding within its mass really, really hated structures and so were acting out?

We rejoiced at this discovery. But there was one breakthrough left. Which was when a team of security guards broke through the door. It was unnecessarily dramatic, honestly, given how many holes they could’ve come through. And their theatrics didn’t stop there. Rather than reason with us, they grabbed us roughly by our tails and carried us this way down the hall to the kennel where all of us lab rats live.

If you could live anywhere, regardless of basic habitability, where would you live?